Perplexing Ponderings

The hubs, my hubs...says that I think too much. Often telling me hush during movies, quite guessing the endings, don't jump to conclusions with the book, take it with a grain of salt..........but I don't, I can't. Like most women I know, I over analyze EVERYTHING! On one hand this makes me very good at reading between the lines, because I am watching, listening, feeling, tasting (just kidding) what goes around me so that I can lay in bed at night and ponder over everything that happened; why I didn't say this, why I should have said that, why did she do that, should I have done this, did I have something in my teeth, did my child really have to pick her nose at that moment ......and eat it, am I a good mom, am I my mother, do my kids know how much I love them, was dinner nutritionally sound, why did I eat those nuggets, how many more diapers will my almost 3 year olds poop.....get the picture? And I know it goes on in my sleep as my mister had told me that I have conversations with him at night.....and sometimes I can remember every vivid detail of a dream that has me wondering in the morning what I need to change that day to get me back on track.....

...on track...that's a whole other issue...

Thinking can get me in trouble, because I often I say what I am thinking...not always good....but I am learning...you would be surprised about how much I have learned not to say.

But often thinking can lead to good things...such as new year resolutions....or over thinking, whatever you want to all it. This year has been nothing knew.

I have pondered my regrets and list of things that I failed to get done, get through or ignored, depending on how you look at it and I have now been pondering what I want to do with this spankin brand new year. Here is my list

1. Throw out what we don't use.
2. Fit back into the clothes that are piled into a bin that you wore more then six years ago...the bin is taking up room in my closet, but
3. Be happy in my skin, don't worry about the  tire hanging around my middle, until resolution #2 is met.
4. Finish a half marathon, just t say I did so that I can fit in with the crowd.
5. potty train the 7 month old since I am potty training twins
6. See my oldest graduate and not be a blubbering mess as he heads into the world....without me...
7. Watch my oldest daughter go to prom....and not bawl when I see her in her first formal dress which is just  precursor to an eventual wedding dress. (I am startin to tear up now!)
8. Find a farmhouse...and be happy if I can't
9. Make sure my kids know how much they are loved...even when I am yelling my head off
10. Keep my house in order...or at least appearing to be so...when the mister walks in.
11. get the stupid crumbs outta my computer so it will type decently!
12. Grow closer to my Savior through more prayer, more pondering and more scripture reading.
13. Touch my husband more...yaya, with eight kiddos you would think there had been a lot of that....but nope, ask the hubs, he's deprived he says
14. Cook all of Julia Child's recipes in 365 days an blog about it.......jk, its already been done, and fairly well I might add.
15. Get dressed in the morning in something other then lounge wear....aka....workout clothes
16. Blog more consistently,like in the AM before anyone wakes up......
17. Enjoy more Italian Cream Sodas
18. Finish the 10 books I have either started writing (or have composed in my mind)...starting with "it's ok to hate your mother...but you will eventually have to get over it."
19. Don't eat store bought bread...it has boiled down remnant of human hair in it......um, yuck.

Maybe this list would be better.....parts of mine is starting to bring me down....

"This year, mend a quarrel. Seek out a forgotten friend. Dismiss suspicion and replace it with trust. Write a letter. Give a soft answer. Encourage youth. Manifest your loyalty in word and deed. Keep a promise. Forgo a grudge. Forgive an enemy. Apologize. Try to understand. Examine your demands on others. Think first of someone else. Be kind. Be gentle. Laugh a little more. Express your gratitude. Welcome a stranger. Gladden the heart of a child. Take pleasure in the beauty and wonder of the earth. Speak your love and then speak it again."
- Howard W. Hunter

If I can do that then all will be well with my world......or better.

I am still seeking my "farm" but I am also trying to be happy with what the Lord has given to my care and let my ideas of what should be go......not easy, but worth a shot....and maybe to share it as I blog.

Finding time to blog and keeping my house in functioning order is where I struggle.  I blog because it makes me laugh...at myself...and hopefully y'all laugh at it too, because crying gives me a headache and I do more then enough during the happy times. and to help me see all the good in my life when I start to think too much. But I want to know how yall do it?

How do y' all do it?How do you blog and keep your daughters hair done, let alone our own? How do you blog and manage get cleaning, laundry and ironing done? How do you blog and put  dinner on the table? How do you blog and keep the crumbs form getting under your keys? How do you do it all....and be happy?

Because as of this  moment...while I blog...none of the above is done...I did brush my teeth....but all my hard work for the last few days looks for naught. Tell me how you do it?!

But maybe I can get me a farm this way or maybe you can....one of us should get it!!! It's worth a try!

Or at least get a chance at  winning cute free stuff here.  Cutest girly girl headbands ever......and heaven knows we could use some help with all the girly girls hair around here!!  Nothing like winning free stuff to perk up your day...

and...

a dry hot cocoa mix that will melt your socks and make you feel all warm and cozy.....

I said I wanted to get healthier by eating more naturally and fit into my jeans....not give up chocolate! And by making hot cocoa mix, I can do that, there is no creamer made from soybean oil, or soy lecithin or preservatives......it's a start, along with a smaller mug!

Love your new years resolution makin guts!

Our Favorite Hot Cocoa

4 cups of sugar (or use powdered sugar)
1 cup cocoa
1/2 t natural sea salt
1 1/2 c dry milk
3 t vanilla powder

Mix all dry ingredients together and store in an airtight container. When ready mix 2 to 3 tablespoons in 8 oz of hot water. Top with real whip cream and heaven is almost right there!!! I love this hot cocoa...but my mister is still craving the ultra good ultra smooth ultra thick store brand mix.....it has hydrogenated oils in it...aka...creamer.....not good for you, so I will be trying to find a way to have that creamy goodness that my husband would probably pay money for.....I want to know! He wants to eat healthy...he just doesn't want to taste the difference! HA!

pickle me some.....

What do all these things have in common.....

22 trips to the grocery store

2 girls registered for school...though I would rather just keep them home...

26 chocolate chip cookies that had to be eaten

4 gazillion times I sat on the couch and nursed a baby girl....well not just a baby girl..my baby girl

4 gazillion and 1 times that I looked at facebook, my hubs thinks I am slightly addicted

1435 loads of laundry

3 laborious and soul searching shopping trips...have you seen the grunge and eighties fashion going on....I may be having nightmares...worse then being nekkid.....okay maybe not that bad....

6 episodes of Big Rich Texas (I heart Texas)

1 pre-season highschool football game....GO #62...that was his dad's number if ya remember or want to know

5 chauffeured rides for  #2 to go to work.....and thus....the three shopping trips....

14 pints of bread and butter pickles just like granma's

1 calming drive to a little highway town

0 miles on the treadmill

400 times that I cleaned up a potty mess......and we are no closer to being potty trained

36 quarts of dill pickles

2 dinners that included grilled corn on the cob

did you guess? do you get it? you need another hint?

um...no post here this week....i am a slacker, i admit it...i did visit other blogs when I found that fb was a repeat....

all those blogs are inspiring and hopeful and knowledgeable.....

and so i will pass along my incredibly knowledgeable and awe-inspiring blogging at 12:30 am on a saturday morning because i didn't do it during the week.....

hold on a moment, time to take a look at the (venison) that is now hanging up in my garage...thank you  #2!

so what knowledge will I pass along? only what I know....

and I will spare you the long and labor inducing stories of birth...so the next best thing is food, canning and preserving those oh so yummy and nourishing summer fruits that we will all be craving this winter.

I love cooking and the love for cooking has expanded to canning and bottling fresh vegetables and fruit to make sure that my family have all the nutrients from homegrown food and to try and live as if I am on my farm.

This year there was no garden......because as you know....I have no farm, let alone a house with a yard....BUT there is a wonderful self pick farm down the road and luckily farming communities that share their labor of love (you have to love farming...or you wouldn't do it!) and in another few weeks and we will be knee deep in tomatoes, and thank heavens because we are plum out!

canning always makes me feel nostalgic and oh so thankful that i have a/c as my kitchen is an oven and i can't imagine what it was like to only have an open window to cool things off. and can you imagine what it was like when the breeze didnt' blow and the rain didn't fall, and yet you still had to bake the bread and bottle the peas and what not because that would be your only food come winter?  again, thank heavens for bought air!

this is my sweet sister and her family with my granma...she looks better then I so I will post her picture!

and today as i prepared the bread and butter pickles i couldn't help but think about my granma and how she loved these pickles with homemade bread and butter...nothing else needed.... i do not know if she made them, she certainly loved them and i know that she bottled other foods, so today's post is to her and my sweet memories of her as i grew up... and her unconditional love and support of me...and that she kept the renderings of my farms for 30 years!

i managed 14 pints, all beautiful and yummy...we (me and the mctwins) were eating them while they were still warm and in the pot!  and they were oh so crunchy! i was a little sad that I had already eaten two rolls today...

and with trying to loose the baby muffin....bread is on restriction to me, by me. if only i stuck to it! so enjoy this recipe and don't eat your allotment of bread until after you have made these!

Bread and Butter Pickles

30 cucumbers, thinly sliced
5 onions, thinly sliced
3 teaspoons diced garlic (I just use the bottles prediced garlic...because I go through it like crazy and it is just easier this way!)
1/2 cup salt
4 cups cider vinegar
7 cups white sugar
2 1/2 tablespoons mustard seed
2 teaspoons celery seed
3/4 teaspoon whole cloves
1 tablespoon and 1 teaspoon ground turmeric
2 teaspoons alum

DIRECTIONS:
1. In a large bowl, mix together cucumbers, onions and salt.
Allow to stand approximately 3 hours. (if you don't use the alum, then you will want to put ice in the mixture to create a more crisp pickle)
2. In a large saucepan, mix the cider vinegar, white sugar, mustard seed, celery seed,
whole cloves and turmeric. Bring to a boil.
3. Drain liquid from the cucumber mixture. Stir the mixture into the boiling vinegar
mixture. Remove from heat shortly before the combined mixtures return to boil.
4. Process the pints for five minutes in a water bath.

thank you aunt Diana for having and keeping all these recipes for me to try and fall in love with all over again!
i made dill pickles too!!! i made dilly beans last year and since my dear cousin wants the recipe, i will share it all with you too! they are such a refreshing change to pickles and so easy to munch on when you just need a quick pick me up and, and, are you ready for this, it helps the munchies go away!  really, if i munch on them, I am not craving other foods.

DILLY BEANS
6 cups water
1 cup pickling salt
6 cups distilled white vinegar
8 heads fresh dill weed (i just used dried)
1/2 cup pickling spice
1/2 cup mustard seed
8 dried red chile peppers
16 cloves garlic, peeled
1 teaspoon alum
5 pounds fresh green beans, rinsed and
trimmed
DIRECTIONS:
1. Sterilize 8 (1 pint) jars in boiling water for at least 5 minutes, or in the dishwasher like i do and i use wide mouth jars for the beans because it is easier to pack them and get them out later!
2. Combine the water, pickling salt and vinegar in a large pot, and bring to a boil. When
it begins to boil, reduce heat to low, and keep at a simmer while you pack the jars.
3. In each jar place the following: 1 head of dill, 1 tablespoon of pickling spice, 1
tablespoon of mustard seed, 1 dried chile pepper, 2 cloves of garlic, and 1/8
teaspoon of alum (the alum is necessary as it keeps the beans crisp!). Pack beans into the spiced jars in a standing position.
4. Ladle the hot brine into jars, leaving 1/2 inch of space at the top. Screw the lids onto
the jars, and process in a hot water bath for 6 minutes to seal. Store for at least 2
weeks before eating.

well there you have it, this is what i have been doing and what i will be doing for the next couple of months, i heart bottling, it makes me feel complete and like i did something good for my family...even though it leaves my kitchen a disaster and I am mopping the floor at midnight!  it is all worth it...really.....because after all you will be creating food that has no HFCS or MSG or other preservatives that make us sick slowly but surely.  tonight is not the night for my soapbox, but rest assured i feel strongly about not putting food in our body that has ingredients in them that you can not even pronounce

and, um...stay tune......i will be sharing my experience with you on cooking and trying deer liver....it is good for you...but i still have nightmare stories about sitting at the table until i finished nasty fried liver that tasted mushy and burnt and a whole lotta other things ....but game liver is fresh and not stocked full of grain and soy products..... this could get interesting!

luv yer guts and then some!